A poem and reflection to explore the Pisces Archetype; following Venus into the Underworld.

Re-discover creativity, self love and the wild feminine within

A rocking in my blood

It feels like a rocking in my blood.

The water, rivers, oceans, calling me back,

To a deeper truth.

Guiding me to the shore

Where I take off my clothes,

Layer after layer

And yet the weight of the past remains,

The restriction, the holding back.

Swim, she sighs. Just swim, so I release my weight into the water.

Diving into a new world

Where invisible wounds heal,

And layers of fear dissolve

And all that remains is a sense of being

One with the waters

Free from what once pulled me down

Drowned me.

The rocking in my blood

Woke me up to a deeper truth

Opened a new world to me.

An inner ocean of peace,

freedom and expression,

Love.

She’s been here, all this time.

﹏

I want to write love letters to the Archetype of Pisces.

It’s the first time this season feels so deeply potent, nourishing, incredibly wild, shocking in some ways.

She helps me remember the poetry within me,

a language that rises from within, through feeling,

sensing, listening, moving in a more instinctual way,

trusting, surrendering to life’s current.

She teaches me about societal, dark, wounds and unconditional love.

The importance of boundaries, protection and self compassion.

She reminds me that death is nothing I have to be afraid of, rather supporting me in giving away the roles, beliefs, attachments I held on to, so I can meet my Self, experience my essence.

And eventually begin to gather, collect, create, weave from a place of true alignment.

Almost like getting naked and falling in love with my hands, my feet, lips - my whole body really - everything that it holds, contains, all the ways I (will) move, experience, sense, express, embody.

Moving more freely, feeling at home within, anywhere. Not wanting to rush through the discomfort of being cold or exposed, but relaxing into my own being. Dancing, tending to my skin, with salt, rose petals, oil.

Because it is so much more than skin care, self care. And yet it is what it is, and it depends from which place you do it, how you tend to your body and heart, nature.

Does it feel like another thing you have to do or does it feel like nourishment for the soul, a ritual. Deepening your connection with the elements within and without.

﹏ this piece of art is now part of my altar. I could loose myself in it, for hours. It’s from a local artist and called “What a relief to know that the ladder I had to climb was within” (he has his shop and studio close to where I live, but he has an online shop (Abre numa nova janela), too)

Venus in her descent. From evening to morning star, and the void, journey, in-between

As Venus moves into the underworld, to appear as a morning star after her descent, like the goddess Inanna following the call to meet her sister (I’ll dive deeper into her story, the mythology, over the next weeks), she traverses Aries for a little longer until she goes back into the realm of Pisces and back to Aries April 30th - I find myself on a similar journey, a journey like no other I’ve ever embarked on before.

It’s wild, unknown and deeply familiar.

Music, art, a connection to my roots, a deeper knowing, are returning, like they’ve been on a journey themselves, trying to exist in this world only to realise they exist timelessly, are not bound to a profession, hobby, talent, anything that ties them to a human made construct.

This is my first attempt of putting words to what I’m experiencing. And it’s no surprise that being in Spain, bringing my inner journey into an external, embodied way of living, happens in a country that lives a different rhythm, where dance, expression, feels more fiery.

My Venus is in Aries (fire sign), which means she will return to the place she was when I was born just one or two days after my birthday, which is on the 20th of May. So just before I experience a return, she embarks on a journey into the underworld - I think this is why I feel her so deeply at the moment.

Venus rules Taurus, which is both my Sun and Moon sign. She also rules Libra, the house where my sun, moon and mercury reside.

She’s exalted in Pisces, meaning this is where her energy thrives in a way, and I’m only beginning to feel, sense and understand this connection.

For me, this opened a portal into a deeper layer of “exploring new/ old ways of living”. I’m remembering how to live creatively, in my own rhythm - why do some of us (many) think we’re not creative?

I believe this protects us from a painful truth: we forgot our own truth, essence, power, innate creative energy.

“Creativity is not what we think it is” - at least not tied to one definition

What is it for you? What do you believe about creativity? Is it true?

I could give you lots of examples of how creativity is an innate force, an ocean, a river, connecting us to all that is.

I studied it through different lenses like Yoga and Astrology but what I really needed was to experience it - also through Yoga and Astrology (embodiment, contemplation, experimentation).

So I won’t give you another definition or construct but some questions to explore it yourself. This is my passion, let me know (Abre numa nova janela) if you want to dive into it together.

• What is your relationship with water?

• How does water feel in your body?

• What impulses to create, express, play, learn are you pushing away because you feel like you’re not good enough or don’t have the time, or it’s not leading to something?

• Are there any (uncomfortable) memories or voices coming up when you think about singing, painting, writing, playing, …? How are those still informing and impacting your thoughts, beliefs?

• How can this Eclipse and Pisces season open a portal for experiencing your own creative energy, clear your inner rivers (see quotes below)

• What’s your relationship to your own sexuality? To your womb space?

Recommendations

• become a member of this sanctuary to receive seasonal resources and inspiration & support my work ♡

• read the story of Inanna

• read Women Who Run With The Wolves, especially chapter 10, clear water: nourishing the creative life

• Join my Telegram (Abre numa nova janela) group for offerings and insights

Here are my favourite quotes from Women Who Run With The Wolves, chapter 10, clear water: nourishing the creative life

“Be wild; that is how to clear the river. The river does not flow in polluted, we manage that. The river does not dry up, we block it. If we want to allow its freedom we have to allow our ideational lives to be let loose, to stream, letting anything come, initially censoring nothing. That is creative life. ”

“Begin; this is how to clear the polluted river. If you’re scared, scared to fail, I say begin already, fail if you must, pick yourself up, start again. If you fail again, you fail. So what? Begin again. It is not the failure that holds us back but the reluctance to begin over again that causes us to stagnate. If you’re scared, so what? If you’re afraid something’s going to leap out and bite you, then for heaven’s sake, get it over with already. Let your fear leap out and bite you so you can get it over with and go on. You’ll get over it. The fear will pass. In this case, it is better if you meet it head on, feel it, get it over with, than to keep using it to avoid cleaning up the river. ”

“Insist on a balance between pedestrian responsibility and personal rapture. Protect the soul. Insist on quality creative life. Let neither your own complexes, your culture, intellectual detritus, nor any high-sounding, aristocratic, pedagogical or political la-la steal it away from you. “

﹏ same artist, José M. Capitán del Río, this one’s called “May you become who you are”

Reading this book now for the second time, diving into these stories with women I’ve met ever since I began choosing my own life and story, really is a dream coming true.

Ever since I started acting on my impulses and dreams, life keeps unfolding in ways that surprise and shock me, in a good way.

Eclipses & Retrogrades as portals and natural catalysts

Yet with so much happening in the world, probably in your inner world, too, and astrologically, I feel grounding, sharing, feeling supported is more important than ever before.

Eclipses and Retrogrades are not supposed to scare us — it feels more like this invitation, an answer to our longing to live more authentically, aligned with our own rhythm and truth. An invitation we might be a bit confused about, nervous, and yet we know, it’s time.

Eclipses stir up old stories and draw us into a current and world we can’t navigate from the mind. Surrender, trust, listen, open the grip.

Retrogrades help us reflect, slow down, align. Yes, during those times weird old stuff can come back, ex partners and lovers etc. with Venus RX but I believe it’s more about recognising patterns and seeing the bigger picture. To let her remind to experience, live and create beauty, to listen to the inner call to dive into our own ocean of creativity, to not be afraid of the darkness and find a soft, fierce power in trust, devotion and ritual.

Here are some reminders and truths I wish I took more seriously when I first heard them… and it feels like during those chaotic, confusing times I want to share them.

I know and trust that everything has its timing, we don’t always know for sure when it clicks, right? Or when or what exactly shifted our inner narrative..

• If I can overcome, move through doubts, limitations and fears, you can, too, I’m not saying this lightly, I really mean it

• We don’t have to do it alone, receiving support doesn’t mean you’re weak, as humans we need each other (leading ourselves, taking responsibility doesn’t exclude receiving/support)

• We need felt experiences to fully believe that a different life is possible. There’s a limit to what the mind can “do for us” when we’re stuck in systems we never consciously chose, when we forgot how to dream, envision, feel deeply

• When dreams grow into a whole fantasyland, guide yourself back to the portal, we need you here, as a human, drawing your dreams into reality, sharing your gifts, here and now (no pressure to perform though, just return, explore and experiment, follow your joy and interest)*

I’m writing this from a cave home in Granada, listening to music, looking over Albaicín.

I’m creating again, drawing, singing, writing, making makramee, reading what sparks my curiosity, learning a new language, connecting with women more effortlessly than ever before.

I cook with joy, I remember my dreams, I rest when I need to.

I know I’m very privileged and supported.

I also know it in my bones that this is necessary.

To break with patterns of pleasing, overwhelming and exhausting myself.

To stop pouring my energy into a system that is in no way nourishing, supportive.

(Over the last year and still, Uranus is transiting my natal moon and sun, which shakes up everything that didn’t get the label “feels authentic”).

I can feel, sense, experience and see beauty, love and connection, while…

I’m recovering from an unhealthy environment, communal life, which wasn’t about community building at all (someday, I will tell this story, at the moment I’m learning the language to understand what happened from a psychological perspective, I’m okay, regaining trust in myself one day at a time).

However this experience has helped me

• wake up,

• trust my gut, and follow my intuition — immediately, without doubting myself. If something feels off, weird, strange, don’t look away. We have this gift for a reason.

• understand that new birth needs protection, it doesn’t mean shutting others out completely or isolating ourselves, but allowing our love and nourishment strengthen the roots, the sprout, first, before we put them outside or co-create and collaborate (this includes values, ways of being and ideas)

I experienced that empathy can be exploited, compassion needs to flow towards ourselves, first.

When the actual behaviour doesn’t match the vision and communicated values, see it for what it is. Yes, a vision is needed and potential is beautiful, if it feels like you’re actually translating it into steps, life.

I hope, know, this was my last big lesson of “falling in love with potential, not trusting my gut”.

I feel there’s so much to explore and say when it comes to light and shadow, descent and ascent, living a spiritual, human, creative life, ending repetitive cycles and patters through awareness, support, allowing a life-death-life cycle to unfold.

I’m here for the experience.

I’m here to learn und unlearn.

I’m here to uncover, untangle, unfold, thrive.

I believe we all are -

equipped with what we need to evolve.

Individually and as humanity.

It begins within.

I hope this serves you in some way,

I hope the way my brain works these days, makes sense to you.

I hope you feel seen and loved.

Please reach out when you feel like you could need some assistance, a person who sits in ceremony with you, sees you, listens.

You can read more about how I work on my website (Abre numa nova janela) ❤

Much love,

Teresa

*This (Abre numa nova janela) is a space to experiment.